Pain and depression

This morning when I got up to go to work, I literally sat on the toilet and cried because I didn’t want to go (I’m a HS teacher - I used to love my job). So, for a second time this week, I called off. I just couldn’t deal with the idea of having to push through constant pain and exhaustion again (even with meds - both pain meds and antidepressants). I know I’m already on thin ice with my attendance. I wouldn’t be surprised if I got fired at some point soon. But honestly, it would be a relief to not have to go to work every day and put on a happy face. I don’t feel like I can talk to my husband about this. I know depression and pain often go hand in hand, but how do you deal with just wishing life could stop? Im just so very tired all the time.