Another Lego underfoot (vent)

My mom has had dementia for 7 years and will be dying within days or weeks. I ordered my birth certificate and marriage license, and today I drove out to apply for my RealID (which will take weeks to arrive, of course.) On the drive home, in brilliant sunlight, I realized that I couldn't possibly get on an airplane to visit my brother and Mom. Just being in the sunlight, on a day when I'd already medicated, was causing major pain. There's no way I could handle the air pressure changes of a long plane flight. Brother says it's OK, because she wouldn't recognize me (true) and he doesn't need me there as support because he's been grieving this for years. Even when it matters, I just can't fly. I wish I could be there. It's not that I'm letting anybody down, but I wish I could hold her hand one last time.