Pre Transition Questions

I am a 30 male that got diagnosed with gender dysphoria a few months ago. I was suicidal for a bit but I feel like I’ve feel accepted that I am trans or non binary. I have struggled to explore my gender identity due to the consequences of possibly losing my marriage and chance to have a family with her. I have come to the terms that I need to do something different in order to feel like I have purpose in my life. I am considering HRT as I feel very interested in how it could help me maybe think/feel differently (and I always dreamed of having breasts). So my question is how did you decide or not decide to do HRT?