Advice if Tamoxifene or TRT better

Hi, I (31m) have done a recent hormone check and have history with mood disorder, generally shitty mental state and persisting PSSD symtoms after psych meds. Always suspected to have low testo levels as my libido was low most of my life, no morning wood etc. for years. Sleep never feels restorative, generally nothing feels "good". Now I got the hormone check results via an online private provider and after consultation agreed on going with Tamoxifene AL 20g per day, even though doc suggested TRT first but for not risking fertiliy agreed to try Tamoxifene first. I have read this drug will probably online increase T production for the duration while taking it and can have horrible side effects. As for me it doesnt seem possible to increase T production naturally and always struggle with bad mood and sleep, would it be smart to ask for TRT or could this also lead to crashes in hormones?